motherhood continuum

Yesterday was Mother's Day in Poland, and I'd like to share a few thoughts with you.

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘸𝘦'𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘧 𝘸𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘥𝘴?

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯'𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘯 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴?

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘻𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘶𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘧𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵?

Women, no matter if they choose to become mothers or not, face societal pressures and expectations.

Not being a mother or not wanting to be a mom doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with us.

Being a mom and wanting to focus on our career or having doubts about our parental capabilities, doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with us.

“Rather, it suggests that there is everything wrong with a society that treats women as a monolith as if being born a woman equips us for parenthood.”*

Ruby Warrington in her book “Women Without Kids” introduces a concept of motherhood spectrum.

⬅ Affirmative "no" to motherhood means saying yes to our authentic selves, not as an act of rebellion, but as an act of willed self-assertion

➡ Affirmative "yes" to motherhood is the full-body, soul-powered, solid-gold knowing that you do want to be a mom

Some women fall on the extremes of that spectrum.

But many women experience a degree of ambivalence about what society sees at “natural, celebratory YES” and “selfish, dysfunctional NO”.

Ambivalence in which, a woman can feel very lonely.

We don’t need to undersign and accept that binary concept of womanhood.
We can change this narrative.

We can foster an understanding and empower each other no matter where we fall on that spectrum.

We can be there for each other, to be true to ourselves 💙

What are your thoughts on the societal pressures women face regarding motherhood, and how can we better support each other in making authentic choices?

*Ruby Warrington “Women Without Kids”